What the Canaanite Woman Taught Me About Prayer

The lay speaker instructor explained our homework assignment to prepare a five to seven minute talk on the scripture listed in the lectionary on the day closest to our father’s birthday. This was Matthew 15:22-28 for me.

As I sat down to prepare my “sermon,” I read the scripture: Just then a Canaanite woman from that region came out and started shouting, “Have mercy on me, Lord, Son of David; my daughter is tormented by a demon.”

But He did not answer her at all. And His disciples came and urged Him, saying, “Send her away, for she keeps shouting after us.” He answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.”

But she came and knelt before Him, saying “Lord, help me.” He answered, “It is not fair to take the children’s food and throw it to the dogs.” She said, “Yes Lord, yet even the dogs eat the crumbs that fall from the master’s table.”

Then Jesus answered her, “Woman, great is your faith! Let it be done for you as you wish.” And her daughter was healed instantly.

As I looked closely at the passage, I saw a loud, maybe even obnoxious, Gentile woman begging Jesus to heal her daughter. She offended the disciples. They asked Jesus to send her away, but He did not respond to them or to her.

Now why is that? I asked myself. Was it because she was a Canaanite, a Gentile? I remembered the Roman Centurion (Matt 8:5-13) who asked Jesus to heal his servant and was received warmly.

Then I thought of the Samaritan woman at the well (John 4:6-23) who talked to Jesus about her past and was taught to receive water that would satisfy her thirst eternally. No, I concluded, it was not because she was a Gentile.

Perhaps it was because she was loud and persistent. But I remembered the parable in Luke 18:2-8 where Jesus praised the persistence of the widow who kept pleading to the unjust judge until he tired of her and gave her what she wanted. Jesus taught that our persistence would move God. No, it didn’t seem to me that Jesus refused to talk to her because of her persistence or loudness.

Why, then, was Jesus choosing to remain silent in the face of such passionate pleading?

I looked back at the scripture. Finally, Jesus spoke to her, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of the house of Israel.” It was then that the woman came, knelt and worshipped Him. She made Jesus her Lord, and by that act, sealed her eternal fate!

This reminded me of some years back, when my husband and I were going through the college admissions process with our daughter. She sent applications to several colleges and was accepted everywhere except the one school where we all agreed she should go. She was wait-listed at that school. We were told there were probably 100 people on the wait list for what might be two, possibly three slots.

We realized it would be harder to get in off the wait list than to get in at the outset. So we moved into action. We got all our friends who were alums of that college to write the school. My husband and I actually drove up to the college, went to the admissions office and told them how much we hoped our daughter could attend.

We came home and began praying in earnest. We prayed for a week. No response. We prayed for two weeks. No response. By the end of the third week, I was emotionally exhausted. I told my husband I was going to turn the problem over to God. Wherever He wanted our daughter to go to school was fine with me.

My husband kept praying—determined to convince God. As he continued, physical symptoms appeared. He thought he was having a heart attack, but the doctor said it was stress. Finally, he too had had enough. I got a call from him at work. He told me he had decided to turn the matter over to God and let God handle it.

Thank goodness, I thought. Now we can get back to our normal lives. Forty-five minutes later, my husband called me again. “I can’t believe this,” he said. “The admissions office just called. They’ve accepted her.”

I cried, and then thought, You know what? If God had answered our prayer on day one, we would have missed a spiritual blessing. We would not have learned to trust.

Now I thought of the Canaanite woman. She, too, was denied an immediate answer. But in the waiting process, when she fell down and worshipped Jesus, she found her Lord. Jesus knew that if He waited, she would do just that because He knew her heart.

There is more to the story. Jesus then tested the woman’s faith by telling her it was not right to throw the children’s bread to the dogs. Despite all odds, the woman in effect tells Him that even a crumb of His healing power is all she needs.

Jesus praised her faith and answered her prayer, giving her something of eternal value in the process (Ephesians 3:20).

I was ready to sum up the story for my lay speakers’ class. How did this foreign woman get the answer she sought with a huge spiritual blessing to boot?

- She was bold—she didn’t let tradition stand in her way;
- She was focused—she wanted one thing;
- She was passionate—she even begged;
- She was persistent—neither the disciples nor the delay she encountered stopped her;
- When it looked as if all was lost, she worshipped the Lord;
- When it still looked as if all was lost, she affirmed her faith.

When I get to heaven, I’m going to find the Canaanite woman and thank her for the insights into prayer and for helping me with my lay speakers’ class message.