From Prison to Praise

How was I to press on when others in similar situations all around me were drowning in despair? In the summer of 2000, while everyone else was out with family and friends, I was in a court with reporters and 12 jury members. Fighting for my life. My name is Lashaun Evans and this is my story of how I overcame, held tight to God’s word and prevailed in the end – even when man said I was guilty.
I was a baby in Christ, but my family had faith that could move a mountain. As my trial began, I constantly sent up little prayers that God would intervene and hear my cries, my pleas. But six months later, I was sentenced and found guilty. Any prayer or faith I had went out of my heart, mind, body, and soul. Here I was a mother of four girls and one on the way. I would have time to give birth, but 30 days after, I had to turn myself in to start serving a 30 year bid.
I stopped praying, going to church, and hanging around at my grandmother’s house because all she talked about was how God was going to move on my behalf once I surrendered. I hadn’t seen God in my situation, my kids or all I had worked to achieve.
If I had had a shorter sentence, and was going away for only a little while, then maybe I could have believed. But 30 years? The rest of my life? Nah, God wasn’t included in my day to day activities after I walked out of that courtroom.
The day finally came. July 31, 2001. I had my baby girl and at a time where there should have been joy, smiles and happy tears, I sank into depression. As I started preparing to turn myself over, I had so much to get done. I turned bitter and heartless not just towards life, but towards God as well; continuing to ask “why?”
August 31, 2001 came so fast. I explained to my two oldest daughters that mommy had to go to school and I’d be back. My heart shattered. Even though they were young, there was a look in their small eyes that said they knew more.
At midnight, I turned myself in, walking into a life, a place, I’d never been or experienced. I couldn’t even turn around to tell my family goodbye as I entered the police headquarters. There was this nagging feeling inside saying, “I will never leave you. Hold on, Shaun. I am the Way.” But the coldness in my heart wouldn’t allow me to heed or listen.
I held my head up high and stared out into space during the whole process, not knowing yet that God had a plan: one that would build me, mold me, strengthen me, and change my hardened heart.
As I started my first year, I started to sink more and more into depression. There was this void that no mail, visits or phone calls could fill. I finally attended a church service after about three years into my sentence. It was a trick, but turned out to be a huge blessing. That night I repented and got saved. I finally started to surrender.
It wasn’t until I got into the New Testament and started reading about Paul’s journey that I saw, from beginning to end, how alike were our ways. What really stood out to me was Paul’s story of when he was in a Roman prison. He was stuck in a cell, chained to a solider 24 hours a day, waiting on a trial that was years away. It was then I started focusing on my faith and walk.
Here is this guy who was facing the rest of his life in prison, but not once did he gripe or complain. He was carrying his challenges straight to God while I was crying like the newborn baby I had given birth to. I had allowed the devil to plant doubt and hatred in my heart, complaining and talking myself out of my own prayer life and blessings.
That day, May 7, 2004, I started praying and rejoicing in what God was about to do, just as He did with Paul. It was then I found that God was bigger than this problem, this prison sentence and all the hardship I faced. I knew He was bigger than my own strength and that I needed His strength if I was going to rise above this 30 year sentence. I finally accepted that if it was God’s will, then I would accept it and allow His will to be done.
As I continued to join prayer groups and completed a Bible study course, I finally won my appeal with the parole board. It had been five years and I’d been turned down three times. On April 1, 2008, my sentence was reduced from 30 years to 10 years. This year is my ninth year in prison. I have six months left and whenever I see a new woman walk into the jail, I am there to encourage and build her up on what a real prayer life and a real relationship with God can do. I can feel God smiling down on me.
This is my last year in prison – I made it! When I look back on all that the Lord has brought me through, all I can say is, “Thank you, Lord Jesus, for saving a sinner like me!” I made it through Jesus Christ who strengthens me. When man gave me 30 years, God gave me favor. Even when I gave up on Him, He didn’t give up on me.
Like David in the Old Testament, I had to learn how to meditate and stay focused on God’s word and His promises. I had to align my spirit with the Word of God, not with what man was saying.
I had to learn to obey and to stand steadfast in my prayers. If it wasn’t for having a praying family and a God who loved me unconditionally, I would have missed a blessing to travel into the prison system and give my testimony. I would have missed the blessing of being able to help lead a prayer group everyday. Even today, I still try to contribute and find ways for the Lord to use me – even here, in prison. I can finally say I found solace in the midst of the turmoil.
By His grace, I have gone from prison to praise.